Movin' on up

Check out the new digs at: www.sophistikated.com

Memo to All: Today is Torture Little Bit Day

Or at least that is how LB is acting... I swear, you would think by the sound of her screams that feeding her, changing her, and holding her close is a form of Chinese water torture. My usually happy little baby is letting me know in no uncertain terms that she is pissed. Unfortunately, as she lacks certain necessary communication skills, I am clueless as to why. Is it bad that I've given up trying to please her and have instead resorted to sticking her in her swing in the hopes that it will eventually shut her up? And that if it doesn't work, well, at least I was able to get a shower? Perhaps I really AM torturing her after all.

In other news, this here blog is going to be moved in the next couple of weeks - so be on the lookout for that. Hopefully it will be sooner rather than later but with the disproportionate rate with which our closing date is drawing near (quickly) and the number of boxes I have packed (zero), the move to the new web address might ended up being a month or more away.

All New Everything

I am officially no longer an employee of Sona MedSpa. I've got two new gigs that I'm excited about - one a part-time job for a huge, nationwide investment firm and the other a sales consultant gig for a friend's technology firm. Basically I'm working the part-time job until the technology firm takes off and becomes stable, consistent income at which point I'll be able to work from home.

Also, we are less than a month away from closing on our houses and I am VERY ready for that to be over. The purchasing experience has been great but the selling experience... let's just say it sucks hard. I'm going to be trying my best not to stick a pen in the eye of our buyer at closing.

Foolish Love

I don't want to hold you
And feel so helpless
I don't want to smell you
And lose my senses
I'll smile in slow motion
With eyes in love

Full Speed Ahead

Well, we sold our house - in five days. Luckily, we also found a house in that amount of time and our offer was (eventually) accepted.

So now Mr. L and I have five weeks to pack the house, with a month-old infant in tow, no less. I'm also returning to work this week, but will probably only be working at my current job for a few weeks. I'll expound more on that when all is said and done, if we ever get to that point.

I swear, we don't ever slow down around here. I am really hoping that once we move into the new house we can just chill the hell out for a while.

I'm worn out.

Life Comes At You Fast

Let's try and recap the last month or so:

• da Momma deployed for Iraq
• Little Bit arrived
• Father-in-law was hospitalized for an eight inch blood clot in his thigh
• My computer died
• Mr. L's computer died
  
• L and I decided to sell our house
• L and I started looking for a new house
• Little Bit was diagnosed with thrush
• I was diagnosed with thrush - in my BREASTS

So yeah, things have been REAL hairy around our house.

Good Morning!

Mr. L woke me up this morning (which is a much nicer way to awake than to the sounds of a fussy baby) and the first thing he said was, "I am so sorry to wake you, but you have to look outside."

SNOW!!

I haven't seen snow since I moved down to North Carolina two years ago and I've MISSED it. Imagine that, me - missing snow!

It was also nice to wake up and realize that Little Bit had almost completely slept through the night. I was only up once with her for a quick change and a bite to eat. My happy little baby generally sleeps in four hour increments during the night, giving mommy and daddy some much needed sleep.

Hopefully we can keep this up!

Say Hello

Little Bit joined us this morning at 8:38 am EST weighing in at 9 lbs, 1 oz and measuring 21 inches. Labor and delivery were smooth sailing and mom and babe are doing fantastic.

He Said, She Said

Her: Do you love me?
Him: Yes, of course I love you.
Her: Do you love me a whole lot?
Him: Yes, I love you a whole lot.
Her: Then please don't ever get me pregnant again.

Holy Expanding Bellies, Batman!

Seriously, where does the time go? It's been a month since I last updated this thing and I could have sworn it was a only a week or so!

Mr. L and I have been eight hundred different kinds of busy getting ready for the appearance of the girl child and trying to maintain our regular personal and work lives to boot. There isn't really anything of much interest going on right now, just waiting and waiting and waiting.

Hopefully I'll pop soon, due date is less than two weeks away - weeeeeeeee!

Highly Laughable

Biggest maternity lie out there:

Purchase your pre-pregnancy size!

All You Need Is Love

Is it true, is love all you need? And if you have love and trust and honesty and dedication and ALL of those things, then why does a lack of intimacy make it feel like not enough? Why must I nitpick the one small area when everything else is so amazing?

And why must I run it all through my head over and over and pick and pick until it is an open, festering wound that hurts like hell?

He Said, She Said

Her: It's kind of like having the best sex of your life, but you know you're going to get gonorrhea, ya know?
Him: No, actually I'm not familiar with that.
Her: Yeah, me either...

Oh. Dear. God.

Peace Symbol Equals Sign to Drop Bombs on Iraq

Honestly, I don't care what side of the fence you sit on regarding the war in Iraq, terrorism, or what have you, this is taking it too far. The woman cannot hang a peace sign Christmas wreath because it is considered "divisive"? Or better yet, a "symbol of Satan"?

Grow the fuck up, dude.

Oh, and I love this little tidbit at the end regarding the HOA president:

Kearns ordered the committee to require Jensen to remove the wreath, but members refused after concluding that it was merely a seasonal symbol that didn't say anything.

Kearns fired all five committee members.

Yes, they're using logic, fire them all! Off with their heads!

Five Months Later

Now we're just waiting for word on the knee - hopefully we'll know something this Friday!

Clearly Bob Vila I Am Not

So last night, ten to two in the morning to be exact, our water heater decided it had had enough. And it's not as if it could just decide it was done and not work, no no, in the R household, things must go out with a bang.

So after a $1300 estimate from the plumber to replace the damned thing, L and I decide we will just head to Lowe's and install a new water heater ourselves. Surely our sanity is not worth $1300, no?

After returning from Lowe's a few hundred dollars poorer, L realizes he needs more items and asks me to return and get them. Now let me back up here for a second and relay to you the fact that I HATE going to the hardware store for items that L needs because a) I'm never really sure what the hell it is he's talking about and b) sometimes he isn't either, he just wants me to ask some customer service rep for help.

Soooooo, I trot on into the hardware store (and by trot I mean waddle because let's face it, I feel like I have a watermelon between my legs) and start hunting for a ninety-degree copper elbow and some copper piping to fit. L keeps telling me he needs everything to be 3/4" so this is what I'm picking up, though I'm beginning to wonder how the hell he is going to join this stuff together as it is all the same diameter.

"Um, I don't know how this fits together, L."

"Look for a coupling sleeve."

"Um, there isn't anything here marked "coupling sleeve," just "coupling" and it's all the same diameter, nothing fits into each other."

"Go ask for help."

*sigh*

And by sigh I mean, "I really wish you would get your ass down here and do this because even if I ask for help I STILL DON'T KNOW WHAT YOU NEED SO HOW CAN I DESCRIBE IT??"

So along comes Joe, who is trying very hard to take the "customer service" out of Customer Service Representative.

"I need some kind of copper something to fit into this 3/4" elbow - my husband said I need a coupling sleeve... ?"

"There's no such thing."

"Ok, can you tell me how I'm supposed to make this copper pipe thingy fit into this elbow thingy?"

"That's a coupling."

"What's a coupling?"

"The "copper pipe thingy" you're holding."

"Ok, how do I make it fit into -- "

And without one word he takes the coupling away from me and hands me a 3/4" diameter piece of copper pipe which - VOILA! - fits perfectly.

"Oh, I gotcha. Sorry, I had no idea what my husband needed."

"If you have no idea, why isn't he here getting it then?"

Joe, I misjudged you. You are indeed a smart man.

Dear...

Wholesomely Cute Stockboy at Ace Hardware:

Thank you for asking me if I needed help as I tried to mire my way through the Black Friday crowd and then pulling up a lawn chair and offering to fetch all of my items for me as I "rested my feet." You really made my day just by recognizing the fact that I was tired and fighting my way through a sea of crazy Christmas shoppers just for one bottle of Lestoil (God's gift to laundry, by the way) wasn't exactly tops on my list of things to do today.

You're probably one of those boys who always calls his mother and plays a quick game of toss the pigskin with Grandpop every Sunday, aren't you?

Hugs and kisses,

greeneyes

Genius In Disguise

As seen on a property listing:

Buy Now Before Price is Lowered!

If I posted, here's what it would look like...

OJ Simpson is a fucking dumbass. There, I said it. I know that to millions of people he is an icon, "The Juice" as it were, but to me he is a bona fide dumbass - either that, or a really big asshole. Who I am fooling? He's both.

"If I did it, here's how it happened"?? Are you kidding me? Save the dramatics and admit it already, you pantywaste. And for god's sake, if he didn't do it then he needs to keep his damned trap shut. I cannot imagine what the Brown/Goldman families must be going through with jughead hashing out details in both book and interview form.

Is OJ that hard up for money that he has to try and profit from such a tragedy? If nothing else, can he not think of his children whose mother was brutally murdered?

Seriously, what a douche.

I also have a good face for radio:

Ganked from the ever-lovely RegionBroad:

What American accent do you have? Your Result: The Midland "You have a Midland accent" is just another way of saying "you don't have an accent." You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.
The Inland North
The West
The Northeast
Philadelphia
Boston
North Central
The South
What American accent do you have? Take More Quizzes